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Welcome to Life in Chains, where writers share the essential roles played in their lives by chain restaurants—great and grim, wonderful double dildo stories terrible. T aco Bell is the best Mexican food I ever ate.

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Taco Bell tacos are crunchy, crispy, meaty sailboats of spicy chemical flavor. Cow Country—Watch Your Step!

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The shining face in taco local lonely

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The shining face in taco local lonely

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Those were dark, cold days. Which is probably why they always seemed to really, really hate me.